رسالتي اليك

جان جاك روسو يقول ان رسائل العشق هي ما نبدأ بكتابته من دون ان نعلم ماذا نريد ان نقول، وننتهي من دون ان نعلم ماذا قلنا.

من كل الرسائل التي كتبتها و أنا أعشق الكتابة لا ينطبق ذلك الوصف إلى على رسالتي التي كتبتها اليك.

لقد جعلت القلم يلامس الورقة بلطف كأنه يداعبها استعداداً لم سوف يسطر عليها. لكن ليس هناك تمهيد في الكون كافي لكي يفي ما سطر حقه. و لكن كما قال الأولون يكفينا شرف المحاولة.

لقد ركض القلم على الورقة في سرعة و سلاسة لم أعهدها عمري كله، كأنه يحاول أن يسبق دق قلبي يا حبيبي، كأنه يريد أن يبارزه للفوز بحبك. 

لكن هيهات فإن قلبي ألف المنافسين و طرقهم ولا يرمش له جفن بعد الأن. قلبي واثق من فوزه لأنه أصبح لديه شهادة الدكتوراه بدرجةإمتياز في حبك!!!

كثيرون لاموني لماذا لم تأخذي من الرسالة صورة قلت لهم في عجب ان قلبي ملك قلبه و روحي ذهبت منها جزء ليس بصغير مع ذلك الظرف. أنا ملكه فكيف لي أخذ صورة من روحي أو قلبي و كيف أجرء أن اتعدى على ممتلكاته!!

 

Lie Baby Lie… But Pretty Please Do Tell

I lie a lot. Everybody lies a lot, I just have the guts to say that I do publicly. 

News Flash:

It’s okay to screw up, cheat, double cross, mess up (even big time), but do please tell. Pretty Please. Especially if the people you have fucked matter to you and if they do to you then most probably you do to them.

They will forgive you, most won’t probably forget, but then that’s what presents, hugs, kisses, and chocolate is for. Just that. Thing is they do too, lie, cheat, double cross, and mess up, so they forgive. Only people they don’t forgive are the ones they were planning to let go of anyway. SO TELL. It’s okay. You’re loved and if you do just that, you’ll be respected to.

We love, I love you. I forgive you in advance, I really do. That’s the truth. I forgive you in advance cause I love you, so I promise to forgive but I will not forget.

Marwa Arafa

Out looking for Him…

All I need is a pair of warm arms to hold me till the break of dawn. Warm and loving, arms that don’t demand physical attraction or emotional attention. 

This post was supposed to be about someone who made me forget that someone, who I just don’t seem to know how to get over or beyond. As it turned out I didn’t love him not really or maybe I did. I think I sort of did, scratch that out, he still gives me butterflies when he looks at me. But butterflies don’t mean love, not always, right? So yes he did make me forget temporarily. Every time I see him, I still kind of do, for a kind of a while, just a while. Thing is I stopped saying even hi, he knows me all too well. And can’t skip the fact that he went into a relationship with a close friend of mine and one of the sweetest girls ever. So I don’t say hi anymore. He still knows me all too well anyhow. It’s sad when the people who know you more than anyone else move good and away. But they do and you seldom move up but you sure as hell move the fuck on.

That was a very short chapter of my life.

A damn short one. No sugar coat. No lessons. No long complicated crap. It’s done. Over.

Much happened after and much have been resolved through. So I’m going to tell you about that instead. 

I was just out looking for him and I ended up with HIM. I wasn’t really myself. I was looking as far as over the rainbow for him…